SGMac
by E. Nagrom
Summary: Col. O'Neill and MacGyver swap bodies and lives much to Carter's annoyance T for some minor swearing.... Chapter 5 now up. yes i updated woo hoo
1. Chapter 1 and 2 combined

SG-Mac

Col. O'Neill and MacGyver change bodies and lives much to Carter's annoyance

Disclaimer: Don't own Stargate or anything to do with it if I did I would have it continue to run after season 10. Don't own MacGyver either. This is my first Mac fanfic and only tried it after watching a couple of episodes so if I seem to make any mistakes PLEASE TELL ME.

Hope you enjoy it all the same.

E.

Chapter 1- The ol' Switch-a-roo

"Sir we can't hold them off much longer!" O'Neill heard his 2IC Major Carter yell over the gun fight as the enemy were attacking if this wasn't such a serious situation he would have found it funny as the sight. 34 Koala Bears attacking SG-1 with advanced weaponry that the SGC and Teal'c had not seen before…well Jack new he new them from somewhere.

"Daniel hate to hurry you but the Koala Bears are winning at the moment—not good!" Jake yelled down the radio attached to his jacket

"Jack, their not Koala _Bears_ Koala's are a marsupial therefore can not be called a bear and don't EVER let an Australian hear you say that! Besides the gate is about to lock in uh-oh" Daniel replied as calmly as only Daniel can.

"Uh-oh, uh-oh isn't good Danny" Jack said looking over his shoulder to see that Daniel was working on the gate address—again.

"Ok it's open Carter need the code." Carter punched in the code through the GDO one by one the SG-1 team all filed through the gate just as Jack went through the gate he felt some sort of pins and needles feeling down his back before falling through the gate.

Daniel couldn't help but laugh as the leader of SG-1 fell backwards on to the ramp of the Stargate General Hammond was about to call for medics when Jack got up and walked down to the rest of his team.

"You alright Colonel?" Hammond asked

"Fine, just over balanced" Daniel heard Jack reply as he was escorted to the infirmary for post-op tests Daniel grinned as he tucked this piece of information away but the grin stopped. The landing was of one that the teams would always land before the expert teachings of Teal'c showed them how to use the gate.

"So did the big Koala bears scare poor widdle Jack O'Neill?" Daniel taunted in a baby voice.

"Actually seeing as how the Koala's are not related to the bear family as they are marsupials and carry the young in the pouch for many months rather than give birth to live young they are nothing like the bear family so are just Koala" Jack replied

"Too shea." Daniel replied hitting the elevator call button.

Janet looked up to see the two men walk side by side into the infirmary

"Ahh, Colonel O'Neill and Dr. Jackson please take a seat I'll be with you after I examine Carter." Janet said as she pressed the needle into Sam's arm.

"Wonder if she will use the big needles today?" Daniel asked hoping to get a rise out of Jack, he instead just seemed to be thinking Daniel couldn't blame him the natives of PJ4-989 seemed friendly enough when they made contact were very accommodating even laughed at Sam trying to out fight their leader but the next morning the 'Koala's' as Jack called them were very fidgety and later hostile towards the team Daniel still doesn't know what had caused the rift.

"So Daniel did you think we would ever meet human size Koala's?" Sam asked sitting next to him on the bed

"No I didn't, they looked like those Evokes out of Star Wars didn't they?" Daniel asked

"Indeed I believe you mean **Ewoks**." Teal'c replied having watched the DVD edition of Star wars out Daniel still doesn't want to think how many times that would have had to have been played to burn holes in the DVD itself.

"Well Sg-1 it seems you are all fit and healthy but I would like you Colonel to come back in an hour or so to allow me to check on the bullet wound on your shoulder." Janet replied.

"Fair enough." Jack replied making SG-1 and Janet look at him

"Wait Jack did you just promise to come back?" Daniel asked

"Sure why not?" Jack asked

"Time to buy that lotto ticket." Sam said out loud

Jack was not happy; first of all he was attacked by over sized teddy bears that should be overfilling a girl's bedroom now he was being attacked by a Brazilian man who made Teal'c's muscles look like cooked noodles. What is going on?

"So MacGyver are you ready to talk? Who sent you here?" The boss asked dressed in an all white suit with gold jewellery decorating him.

"Would you believe I have no idea?" Jack replied he didn't have enough time to breathe in before he was winded by the other man.

"Mac Mac Mac Mac Mac Mac your doing yourself no favors by acting like a hero better men than you have failed to hold on information when I'm cranky let alone pissed." The boss said. Jack didn't even know who this MacGyver was let alone what he was doing here.

"Wait, I think I know how to make you talk send him to the cooler." The man replied

"Oh Yay the cooler why do you guys call it a cooler when it does—the heating thing." Jack stated as he was placed in the rusty iron cadge in the middle of the sun. Leaning his head back Jack thought about the past 3 hours becoming more and more confused.

He headed to the Stargate trying to work out what Daniel meant by the uh-oh when he felt pins and needles followed by an Asgard teleportation device then being knocked out then three wonderful hours of 'Ask no questions…tell no lies" all he hoped was his team mates will find him before he goes nuts!

MacGyver was starting to think something was unquestionably wrong when they had to talk to the commanding officer General George Hammond as he was starting to think that this was not a new information gathering technique the team consisting of Major Samantha Carter, Dr. Daniel Jackson and Teal'c seemed to not say much at all, and has a strange tattoo on his head cool but strange.

"Colonel do you wish to add anything?" The General asked him

"No I believe that about covers it." Mac replied, _well I didn't exactly lie _the General was obviously puzzled at his lack of opinion but Carter and Jackson seemed to have done a good job explaining the people on P…PJ4-989 what ever that is.

"O'Neill would you care to join me in a round of 'ping pong'?" Teal'c asked

"Sorry no can do promised Doc I'd go back to the infirmary how about after?" Mac asked heading down to the elevator hoping he hadn't blown his cover.

Sam noticed that everyone including the General went to her office to talk about Jack.

"I don't understand it looks like Jack, sounds like jack but the mannerisms and everything else isn't Jack." Daniel started the others agreed.

"The way he landed well rather didn't land wasn't the colonel either."

"Let's not forget him coming back to my office. Sir I went over the tests three times that man in there is either an exact copy or Jack has some illness that doesn't come out in tests." Janet replied walking in the office. Sam was about to make a comment when Walter's voice came over the P.A.

"Chemical leak in Lab 34, warning chemical leak in Lab 34." Instantly the sirens and red lights came blazing the party left Sam's office to render assistance in the lab.

They made it to the lab to see that Jack was there showing the scientists how to stop the acid leak with…chocolate? This was all the proof everyone needed that this was not the correct colonel.

"Who ever you are you are under arrest." General Hammond authorized the look on Jack's face didn't help any instead of its usual what? It was guilty.

"I suppose the time to come clean has arrived. My name is MacGyver and I have no idea how I came to be here."

Jack was not happy he had been in here long enough for him to never want to touch the oven again…'wait when was the last time I used the oven. No think dammit how to get out of here'… before he could think of a plan he was blinded by the light shining through muscles reached in and pulled him out forcing O'Neill to stand on his legs that were as burnt as they felt he was then half dragged to the man's boss who was sitting in front of a desk fan.

"So MacGyver you thought that you could out wit us with the use of a bomb. We have de-activated the bomb but if you don't tell us where the girl you helped escape has gone we will blow up Colorado Springs"

A/N Thanks for the reviews _Adm. Bones_ and _Midget 101 _that was really appreciated and offcourse to you all for your interest in this fanfic.

Chapter 2

Jack couldn't believe it tell this Bozo about some chick that has escaped or get his town blown up he looked around to try and find the camera's waiting for someone to yell "Smile your on candid camera" But that opportunity never occurred and Jack was running out of time the man was getting more insistent every second and getting more and more angry as time went by, Jack almost missed the snakeheads eyes glowing when they are pissed, almost.

"Would you believe I have no idea where the girl is?" Jack asked wishing for the hundredth time to have Daniel and Carter's negotiation abilities the man got up from the fan and walked over to the other side of the table leaning back on it with his arms and legs crossed at ease with the situation.

"MacGyver not know anything? Sorry Mac been in this business for awhile now you are a man who can put a fire our with gasoline—"

"Uh boss, isn't that impossible?" The big burly man asked Jack was waiting for the 'Duh' sound from 'boss'

"I think that was a metaphor" Jack replied with out thinking, well he was to the planet where there was a Civil War on between two cultures unbeknown to them they were helping the 'enemy' the ones who in sighted the war the creators of the war.

"You know Mac I thought you would have been hitting me at every corner with your unique sense of humor but I can't see any of it." Boss replied

"Oh but I'm sure we will have plenty of time to get to know each other over tea and biscuits." Jack replied mimicking the knights who say 'Ni' the boss just laughed and picked up a remote control for detonating a bomb. 'Obviously Colorado is close by….' Jack thought to himself 'wait it can't be Carter made mention if we were 200 light years further they would need an 8th symbol. Where is his team to help him out of this? Where is Carter dammit!

General Hammond, Major Carter and Teal'c were looking at the CTV screen of the interview with 'MacGyver' who seemed to have very limited information for them that was any use. Hammond looked over to SG-1

"Who the hell is that in O'Neill's body?" Hammond asked they new the Goa'uld were good at hiding themselves in another host until they wanted to make themselves known but there was no sign of any symbiots inside of him and Carter and Teal'c never had the sensation of a Goa'uld in him.

"Sir, I have looked up every record I could think of there is no live, dead, ill MacGyver who ever this "O'Neill" is he is not from Earth. Daniel and Teal'c have looked up anything on the computer about him to find…nothing no cults, no reference, no hint of a MacGyver out there." Sam replied

"Perhaps this is another form of 'Alternate Reality'" Teal'c declared Sam and Hammond swapped glances at each other

"It is a possibility I mean sir, as you know every action deserves a re-action a decision leaves a path for the other option perhaps this is one A.R that seems to be based on a different life for the Colonel." Sam replied.

"Are you trying to tell me that that man down there could be another form of 'Colonel Jack O'Neill?" Hammond asked dreading the answer Sam looked at the TV to her side where Daniel was trying to understand the situation

"For all I know…he could be." Sam surmised

"Sorry to keep you. How are you?" Daniel asked sitting down on the vacant side of the table in a military grey room/ holding cell. 'Jack' grinned the only way Jack can

"I'm confused I'm afraid you have me at a total disadvantage, I know absolutely nothing about what's going on here. But I do have high security clearance." Jack replied.

"Obviously not high enough" Daniel muttered under his breath as he got out a new file and handed the other man coffee with milk and sugar on the side if he wanted it.

"Trust me we are about as much in the dark as you are. You see the person's body you're inhabiting is a friend of mine's Colonel Jack O'Neill he was supposed to come here with us not you…" Daniel replied hitting himself for sounding so self-centered.

"Trust me I don't want to be here the last thing I remember is helping a woman escape and dismantling a bomb using sugar cubes and shoe laces then falling flat on my back with you and your friends laughing." Jack replied

"Yes about that, can I ask what you were doing?" Daniel asked Jack Shrugged

"Sure, you see my name is MacGyver Mac for short, I work for the government to stop anything from exploding, causing devastation. I was on my way to a hunting trip with my friend from high school who has just quit his job as a hell fighter. We were going up the mountains but I was delayed and got lost. I went to stop at a local restaurant for directions that got me even more lost—"

"And yet you managed to stop an acid attack with chocolate bars?" Daniel interrupted.

"Hey maps aren't my forte. Anyway I sort of accidentally ran into some drug traffickers who held a pilots daughter hostage while he delivers the opium to the manufacturers, I was late anyway and decided five more minutes wouldn't hurt so I went on a rescue op. after this girl. I managed to cause a few distractions around the perimeter of the old airplane hanger and get her to safety before I was captured by this one Brazilian guy who would make Arnold Swarzenegger a feather weight. The man brought me to this rich boss who was shorter than my brother's current girlfriend—trust me that's short—who informed me that because I hindered the Opium delivery the villagers in the next town were going to be punished as they sent me to help them. My attempts to stop them only caused me to be hit by the help I was sent backwards and landed here." Mac replied Daniel wrote it all down asked a few questions then went to relay the incident to the rest of the SG-1 and Hammond.

Jack wasn't sure why the villagers were to be punished by him not telling Bob where the girl went, after all they were not part of the tiff…were they? He saw that the leader was talking to several old men accompanied by some young teen early twenty year old female's one looked very different from the other tribes as she was white as the other's were beyond tan more like the picture of Zeus Daniel kept in his house that was given to him as a joke gift from Carter two Christmases ago. There were raised voices in a language that Jack didn't understand but new the tone wasn't a good one so he fought off his guards and went to try to calm the waters he managed to reach the crowed where the obvious leader of the village was trying to talk reason to his captor.

"Mr. Shan assures you Master Hermann that he doesn't know anything about a plot to make you leave they are all happy that you are here you bring them employment, money and prosperity—" The girl replied with a strong Australian accent.

"Ask Mr. Shan why that when an intruder has arrived my daughter and the man who was delivering the opium have gone?" The girl relayed the message in the native tongue and replied.

"Mr. Shan begs you to believe that his people didn't invite him perhaps another village further south?" The girl was slapped by Hermann Jack had enough of listening from the sidelines and went to do something about it.

"Hey, just because you don't like the answer doesn't mean you can take back the question!" Jack said sliding down the slope landing inches away from Hermann

"You are not permitted to be part of this conversation" One of the body guards said leaning close to Jack's face.

"Whew can I offer you a breath mint? No how bout four?" Jack muttered the man was about to slap Jack before Hermann stopped him in the native tongue the man just glared at Jack but he was immune just mention the name Tanneth in Teal'c presence and you get a better glare that that!

"Mary its five o'clock the men will be hungry soon." Hermann replied the Australian Mary bowed down and went to another building that Jack guessed was the kitchen.

"You are wearing my patience thin boy you thought I was hard to get along with now wait until I decide I have waited long enough for my answer about Jackie" Hermann replied the villagers bowed down so low they may almost be able to smell the ground when Hermann walked past. 'Opium, Jackie, villagers…this is one scenario that Jack new he had to correct he was escorted back to his hut when he saw the blue eyes of Mary watching him through the window. 'But first I better see what Mary is up to.'

"After listening to the evidence and talking to Mac myself I can see no other alternative than to have you all working together to get Jack and Mac to their rightful places." Hammond informed SG-1

"Sir, what about security?" Sam asked

"Taken care of major. As of ten minutes ago the president has informed me that what ever you need to get Jack back." Hammond concluded the briefing by leaving the table with Sam rising as a sign of respect.

"Well let's go see what help Mac can be shall we?" Daniel asked as he got up. They all went to introduce themselves to Mac besides Daniel who had spoken to him on several occasions now.

Sam was working in her office trying to ignore the annoying sound of Mac's voice. Seriously this guy is worse than McKay hmm maybe it has to do with the Mc in the name Sam smiled to herself at that thought.

"See told you, your beginning to like me I can tell" Mac replied from his end of her office. She looked up from the microscope to look at him in the eyes but faltered. '_Why is it every time I see him using technology correctly I feel the sudden urge to buy that lotto ticket_.' Sam thought to herself

"Listen MacGyver as soon as you are away from me and back to your world the happier I would be." Sam replied as she went back to work she heard movement from the other side of the room but ignored it.

"If you put the light there you won't have to strain your eyes." Mac said as he moved the lamp Sam rested her eyes on the table before looking at him.

"Thank you ever so much." Sam replied sarcastically Mac didn't seem to notice as he walked back to his experiment of trying to attach chewing gum to some sort of electronic thing he made.

"If you want some blu tac all you had to do was ask I have a stash in the right drawer," Sam replied.

"No thanks they won't bring out the right consistency of electrical current I need." Mac replied Sam just shook her head and left the room she was walking down the corridor when she ran, literally, into Daniel and Teal'c.

"Hey Sam how is it in there with you and Mac?" Daniel asked

"MacGyver is worse than McKay…which reminds me can he return for a few days from Russia?" Sam asked Teal'c raised an eye brow.

"Man Mac must be really annoying for you to want to work next to Rodney but I'm afraid as much as he loved the fact that you needed his help he can't make it in the middle of something." Daniel replied Sam should have expected that since MacGyver has come into the picture her life has been driven insane and everything has gone wrong.

"Sam we were looking for you, have you seen Mac?" The new scientist asked she turned bright red when MacGyver turned up in the same corridor and became a babbling buffoon.

"He needs to go." Daniel replied

"I concur." Teal'c replied Sam looked at them both in awe and shock.

"Wait I thought you guys liked him? That you wanted to make him feel at home?" Sam repeated their statements.

"Well. Yes I suppose so but…" Sam new it he did like the new girl Sam just grinned at him and walked off glade to know that he wasn't only annoying her.

"Carter wait." MacGyver yelled Sam turned round to face him

"I understand this can't be easy for you, this isn't a ball game for me either but can you please stop being the annoying brat?" MacGyver asked

"I'm the annoying one?" Sam asked she couldn't believe the gall that MacGyver had.

"I'm not the one who insists on the lamp being placed too close to the samples, I'm not the one who frequently changes the layout of MY office; I'm not the one who—"

"Ok ok point taken. Sam I need to get home ASAP the Opium dealers won't keep O'Neill alive forever and the Opium needs to be stopped before more villages are destroyed." MacGyver replied.

"I know the gravity of the situation MacGyver, but we need to work in a way that is comfortable for both of us." Sam replied Mac held out his hand.

"Deal."

"Deal." Sam agreed.

Jack paced the new cell floor for something to do. He finally dunnit over stepped the bounds that were there. He told Hermann once too often to go to hell and now he was paying for it. He didn't mean for this to happen all he wanted was for him to leave the villagers alone or for them to rebel but no instead he is in a 3x4 foot room with nothing to sit on but the dirt floor and a window that was made by an angry fist on the furthest wall from the door. He tried to escape and talk to one of the local villages but was turned in by one of the loyal members. The door opened to allow Mary inside who was carrying a plate of food; bread and salad, milk and a table all at once. It was the first time that Jack managed to see what she was wearing a loose white top with a gypsy style skirt that made her look like she was dressed in a Mexican theme she did look in his direction but not to his face or eyes. She kept her head bowed.

"Mr. Hermann believed you may be hungry Mr. MacGyver." Mary repeated her Australian accent strong she looked like she could do with a meal herself

"Thank you. By the way the names—"

"Mac I know…but we must be formal here Mr. Hermann doesn't allow it to be any other way." Mary replied she then started to head to the door.

"Wait, wait a moment can I ask you something?" Jack asked Mary closed the door and then looked at him.

"Sir?" Mary asked

"What would you say if I told you I have no idea who MacGyver is? That I am from some other place and the name's Colonel Jack O'Neill?" Jack asked the girl looked at him and smiled.

"MacGyver you are full of tricks there is no way we are ever going to fall for any of them." Mary replied as she left. Angrily ripping apart the bread Jack thought of a new way to break out of here and go to a different village. Jack noticed the sun had gone down and Mary had been and gone for the plate she left a large bottle of water for him that was concealed in her backpack that she 'accidentally' left behind. Jack rolled up his jacket to use as a pillow and looked out the 'window' to the clear night sky wondering which one of those stars is home. Jack didn't realise that he had dozed off until he heard Mary walk up to him,

"Mac?" She whispered Jack stood up to allow her to see him

"Get down!" She whispered and walked to him where she sat opposite him on the ground. She had changed her skirt to jeans.

"Is it true that you are not MacGyver?" Mary asked she was sitting in a way that allowed herself to prop her head on her right knee.

"Yes, I am Jack O'Neill two l's." Jack replied Mary thought for a moment before replying every so softly.

"If this is true then you are truly in the wrong place. Mr. Hermann is insistent that you are MacGyver the man who can make bombs out of wire and fertilizer." Mary replied

"I leave that up to Major Carter." Jack replied Mary got up and looked out of the door

"The men are still partying I must get back to them. I must return with my bag, did you look inside it?" Mary asked Jack didn't know how to respond Mary nodded her head.

"I'm glade." She replied as she left Jack was still going through the conversation when he heard gun shots that turned his blood cold he tried to open the door to see what was happening but the wooden door was not opening no matter how much instistance he gave it. The men were laughing and calling each other generally having a good celebration, Jack was not too sure how much more he could take. Ok he wasn't abused or tortured in any way shape or form but he was more worried about his team. He hoped that he was right in saying they were not in this but there was that nagging doubt. The party had died a few hours after the gunshots and all was quiet Jack pretended to be asleep when the guard came in to check on him before closing the door and locking it.

"O'Neill, Oi wake up. Colonel two L's." Mary said Jack woke up to be disoriented

"Mary? What's wrong?" Jack asked waking instantly Mary helped him up to his feet,

"Hurry we don't have much more time before Mr. Hermann will wake the guards took forever to go to sleep. Quickly follow me." Mary said she led him out of the room to a well built house of bricks that had many rooms built in the hut reminded him of Daniel's first apartment from his return from Abydos. Mary went to the room second to the right and motioned him to follow her, when they got into the room Jack saw a device that would make Carter and Daniel green with envy. From what he could tell it was a Goa'uld device as it was decorated in gold, it looked like one of those merry-go-round eggs that had hollow doors around it. Upon closer inspection he could see Goa'uld writing on it.

"I take it you have seen one before?" Mary asked when Jack opened up the crystal bay.

"I know the design techniques of the race that built these." Jack replied Mary came to see what he was doing.

"Wow, why is that crystal black not vibrantly coloured like the rest?" Mary asked

"Because its burnt out and needs to be repaired." Jack exclaimed "You don't have any spares do you?" Mary shook her head.

"I'm not supposed to know about this, my job is translator, cook, maid, and other duties not electronics." Mary replied

"Why did you show me this?" Jack asked Mary shrugged and replied

"This was where I found MacGyver before he was looking at this intrigued by the design he touched a few of these symbols and also complained of pins and needles and we experienced a power outage. He touched it again I was called away by Mr. Hermann and I'm assuming that is when you arrived as Maddy was gone by the time you arrived." Mary replied. _Ahh a teleportation device or communication? What would the Goa'ulds want with this? As far as they were concerned Alternate Realities never exist. _

"I'm hoping that at night we can work on a way to get you back to your home." Mary replied.

"I don't think so young lady." Hermann said behind them seconds before they were bith knocked out.

A/N well that's chapter 2 up please bear with me as I try to upload this, I'm sorta learning as I go. Also I am hoping to update soon but I have end of year 12 (HSC) exams but I hope to update frequently as this is my stress reliever. E.


	2. chapter three

A/N: Sorry for the loooong delay but it seems that the HSC took up more time than I expected, then the computer was wormed, then we had to reformat the computer then I had to help my grandmother it's just been a complete mess!

Thank you for everyone who has reviewed the last three chapters and for some of you pleading for me to continue…re-reading chapter three I have decided to re write the third chapter….seems I have a lot to learn about writing.

Enjoy the second time chapter three is up

E.

Jack was laying on the hard dirt floor trying to ignore the pain thumping through his skull the tune was almost like 'we will rock you' he tried to think about what would have caused so much pain and agony when he remembered the device Mary showed him sitting up and leaning against the wall he saw that the sun had come up high above him he would have guessed it was noon maybe one. He heard a scrapping sound from outside followed by the door opening standing up Jack realized that Mary walked in with another meal setting down the tray on the table before leaving.

"Wait, I just wanted to apologize for last night…" Jack said Mary shook her head but never looking at him.

"No the fault was mine, please know I won't do anything like that again." Mary said before 'muscles' came in and forced her out of the room. Jack looked over at the selection of fruit before selecting a small apple thinking of a new way to get them both out. He new that Mary had either been punished or was about to be but he didn't want to take the risk. He had to find away out of this he was Col. Jack O'Neill former black ops and apparently some guy that is able to make a solar flare with a toothpick and chewing gum! Looking out the window he noticed that Mary was looking after the men who seemed to be cruder than the captors he had during many POW camps. Yes he had to get Mary and himself out of here…

Daniel walked in to see Sam and Mac working on something that didn't look like it would help in any way shape or form leaning in closer he saw that they were working on a Goa'uld piece o technology…well not quiet as it was made of play dough.

"Daniel glade you've arrived. Mac here thinks that what went wrong was he touched this device as you must have dialed home. You said yourself that the Stargate seemed to have 'lit up' before shutting down then working normally. What Mac and I think has happened is that somehow this device managed to get two completely different lives in another reality to see how they would cope. And as you know Colonel O'Neill and Mac here are completely different." Sam explained Daniel was still skeptical over this.

"Sam, if this device was to work wouldn't there be two of them? No offense but I don't think play dough will count." Daniel asked sitting down handing Mac and Sam coffee.

"Daniel can I keep you? That's the best coffee I've had! Is this on base?" Mac asked Daniel grinned.

"No, I bought it from home thinking you need a decent cup of coffee." Daniel replied Drinking his cup.

"Thanks Daniel, Any way I was hoping to talk General Hammond in allowing us to go back to the planet with Mac, to see if we can find the device Mac found." Sam replied

"Whoa Sam. Do you really think the 'powers that be' are going allow this?" Daniel asked

"Powers that be?" Sam replied

"Pentagon?" Daniel replied

"Hello, I look like Jack O'Neill can't we just say 'Hey I'm back what did I miss?" Mac asked Daniel and Sam just looked at Mac.

"Did he just sound like the colonel?"

"He did sound like Jack." With all three of them working on the technology and Daniel correcting Mac on the spelling and pronunciation of many of the symbols they eventually got the 'device' ready to show General Hammond.

Jack had no idea how to take this Mary girl she acted like she didn't want to help him but sends him weapons in the fruit he has a broken tooth to prove it. The guards weren't so heavily protecting him in the heat of the day and he hadn't made anymore trouble since the 'Goa'uld room' he heard the guard rattle the chain to make sure it was secure before sitting down near the door in the limited shade. Jack new to wait a few minutes before using the tools to help his escape. He heard it. The sweet sound of a rhino snoring. No that would be a jackhammer actually doesn't matter Jack new this was the opportune moment to escape sitting down near his 'pillow' made out of his—no MacGyver's jacket he removed it to see the tunnel staring to take place taking the spoon that was meant for the kiwi fruit Jack started to dig. He got just past his elbow when he heard the snoring stop he listened for a moment the voices came from the side of the hut to where the window was situated quickly getting his arm back up and covering the hole with his pillow and facing the opposite wall he heard the men leaving staying very still Jack heard the snores start again. Not to be taken as a fool Jack waited for a few more minutes to make sure that he wasn't being watched. When he felt that enough time had passed he went on the escape plan and returned to his tunnel. Thinking to himself and making promises to anyone willing to listen to give him enough time alone to escape his attention met with a new easier plan. Instead of digging his way out he can get the thin blade from the banana but first he needed to make a track for the bamboo to follow when he made the door. Studying the way the bamboo was tied it seemed to be built horizontally with long pieces of bamboo, but if Jack could cut the first five from the ground, use the rope as a hinge, squeeze out drag the bamboo with him he would be fine. Taking the plan into action he started to cut the ropes of the bamboo he pulled on the loose bamboo sure enough it came apart easily with enough of a gap for him to get through he started to squeeze through and drag the door behind him. He saw where the sentries were and found a shrub that would hide him until night fall where he could look at the device again…hoping against hope the Colorado bomb won't go off when Hermann finds out that he escaped, though they will probably look at the device room first but he's hoping that the conversations between him and Daniel that he didn't want to hear will come in and help him with this. He needed to be at his real reality back home in the lake that has no fish, in a room with Carter confusing him about how the galaxy is an apple and they are worms going through the apple and something about metaphors.

Hiding behind a rock where he was sure no sentry could find him he waited till night fall to go back to the device and head home. Jack saw Mary walking towards his hide out running an obvious track as no one tried to stop her or she was free to come and go as she pleased. She passed the last sentry where she was stopped she spoke to him for a few minutes then was granted permission to go. She was nearing his spot before he new it she was on top of his spot, reaching out he grabbed her and pulled her down.

"What are you doing?" Jack asked Mary who then looked at him in surprise

"Exercise…promise…ok I'm leaving I can't stand Hermann I never could. He has finally given me enough rope to leave." Mary replied Jack listened intently.

"Help me work the device to get home and come with me, we can give you a whole new life" Jack invited Mary thought for a moment then nodded

"But please wait here for me to make sure the coast is clear." Mary said

"Marie! Marie are you alright?" The guard asked Mary stood up.

"Sorry fell over. I believe I have had enough exercise for one day." Mary replied before walking back to the guard.

"We should have you checked for any injuries." He replied

"Oh no I'm fine promise, besides if I go now dinner will be late…and you know how angry the men get." Mary replied.

"What's for dinner?" The man asked

"What would you like?" Mary asked…Jack had enough of listening it seemed that the man had nothing but fatherly love to Mary but letting her stay with a criminal like that is not right.

As she promised Mary came back when the men had gone to bed and walked with him to the device. It looked like it did before he went to the other side of the device while Mary had locked the door on the inside. She came round to his side of the device

"So what do you think it is?" She whispered

"I think it's a transportation device but I'm not too sure. You see for me to have come to this reality I needed a large energy source to have been able to bring me here. This I am hoping will let us get back to my world." Jack replied Mary showed him a collection of crystals.

"Will any of these replace the one that was broken?" Mary asked

"How did get these?" Jack asked

"I acquired them from Mr. Hermann's desk." Mary replied Jack looked at the crystals opened the side door took out the burnt out crystal.

"I think I need this one." Jack replied looking at the brilliant blue crystal he placed it in the chamber and allowed it to close.

"O'Neill did this happen a few minutes ago?" Mary asked the inside panels were lit up and seemed to be working. Jack was amazed at how quickly he was able to fix the Crystal panel he would have thought it was going to take longer than that to get the technology to work.

"O'Neill? Is this supposed to happen?" Mary asked Jack came round to see that there was an electrical current running up and down the gold device where Jack and Mary were standing. When the light show had stopped Jack and Mary walked closer to the control unit to see that the control unit was able to be used. Jack dialed the Stargate address to go home.

"…So you see sir, with the Intel from Mac and the readings of the planet the device we need should be in the cave here." Sam replied pointing to a cave almost the opposite direction that they traveled at before.

"So you sure this device will be able to send Mac home and Mac can teach the colonel how to use it?" Hammond asked.

"With out a doubt." Mac replied full of his confidence.

"Well, with this Intel and the way your all prepared to go…if I say no you will go anyway so you have a go as of 0900 tomorrow." Hammond replied

"Thank you sir." Was chorused around the table.

"Unauthorized Incoming Wormhole repeat unauthorized incoming wormhole." Walter replied SG-1 and Hammond went to check what was wrong.

"No IDC yet sir, but who ever it is, is coming through the 'gate." Walter replied,

"Is their any communication?" Hammond asked.

"No sir." Walter replied before Hammond could ask his next question two people were thrown through the iris. The security teams went up the ramp weapons trained on the new arrivals, the leader talking to one of the people then looked to the General.

"Sir, this man claims to be Colonel O'Neill and wants it placed on his uniform." The man yelled out.

"Thank you sergeant. Do they need medical attention?" Hammond asked he saw that SG-1 had left and were now in the gate room.

"Only mild cuts and scrapes sir." Sam replied as they helped Jack and another girl up. Hammond went to see who this girl was.

"Ahh, General Let me introduce to you Mary, Mary this is General Hammond." Jack replied

"Pleased to meet you sir." Mary replied

"Glade to have you back Colonel why don't you show Mary to the infirmary and we will debrief in an hour. Actually make it two and have a shower." Hammond replied as everyone showed Mary where to go.

"Ah Colonel O'Neill I see your back ready for the needles?" Janet asked with a grin.

"But I only went to a different reality." Jack protested

"But you were on another planet before then," Janet replied she took care of the cuts and scrapes from Jack and the tests before she ran a few on Mary who was looking around in awe but still looked scared out of her brain.

"Hi I'm Janet Frasier, I understand your Mary?" Janet asked

"Yes, Yes I'm Mary Acret pleased to meet you." Mary replied Frasier then started to stitch the cut above Mary's eye before starting on the usual tests with new guests.

"I hear you helped Jack escape…Hermann?" Janet asked

"I didn't play much in the part but I suppose you could say that." Mary replied Janet cleared her ready to go and helped her down.

"Here I thought you might like a change of clothes before going to see the General it appears going through the Iris has damaged your clothes." Janet replied. Jack looked down at their clothes to see that they had been torn but hers was made of lighter material were worse for wear.

"Thank you." Mary replied they left her alone for her to change into the clothes that Janet had for her that Cassie had out grown. Mary came back in clothing a bit too big for her making her look like an orphan. Before anyone could say anything Mac walked in and Jack and Mac spotted each other.

"Hello you must be Colonel O'Neill, I'm MacGyver... Mac." Mac introduced himself Jack shook his hand.

"Jack so how do you like our quaint facility?" Jack asked

"It's very easy to get lost." Mac replied

"He has a thing for not following maps." Daniel piped up.

"Ahh something we have in common." Jack replied

In the de-briefing room they all spoke about the past few days with little input from Mary who was still trying to get used to the idea of this place. Jack was expecting it after all what he could see now that she was wearing a sleeveless top she was not in the most loving of environments.

"Ok, we need to find a way to get Mac home, Colonel do you think there will be a way to get him back to the other reality?"

"I don't know sir, Hermann will be pissed that 'Mac' managed to get two girls to have escaped. And we need another device and need to know the Stargate address." Jack replied

"Well I have high security clearance in my reality and I have never heard of a Stargate." Mac replied.

"I'll go work on some simulations." Sam offered.

"Mary and Jack do you remember what the symbols looked like?" Daniel asked

"Yes" They replied

"We could do some translating and see what we can come up with." Daniel replied Teal'c decided to help them while Mac was going to the simulations Mary was still sitting at the rather large table trying to work out what she should do. She is used to not being useful for long periods of time.

"Mary why don't you come with me? I'm sure you would be a great help." Sam asked Mary went to follow Major Carter when Jack replied. "Oh she will be more than great." Mary carefully and quietly followed everyone out of the briefing room.


	3. Chapter 4

A/N

Sorry for the long delay (8 months) time travels when you're reading everyone else's Fan Fiction's. Thank you to RGreen (Also an author on FF) for booting me up the butt making me update (Oh then DELETING the chapter on me thanks a lot appreciate it ;P)

Oh and incase people are wondering I fixed up the double up chapters save reading the entire chapter again for 4 lines any how back to getting Mac back to his reality.

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Sam and Mac were working in Sam's office looking at simulations to get Mac back to his reality but everything they came up with so far has been either too risky or down right lethal. Sam had to admit with out actually knowing what the device was supposed to do running simulations was pointless—then again so was sitting back and doing nothing.

"Well that can be thrown in the 'no way' pile! I like my face in one piece." Mac said while crossing out simulation #57 off the list Sam looked over to the monitor in front of Mac.

"I don't know it looks better sort of mysterious." Sam replied trying not to laugh at Mac's ''you have to be kidding' face his face looked fine but when you looked at it harder you could see the eyes were upside down as was his mouth…looked very scary

"Next simulation." Mac replied ready to type in the new code.

"There is no simulation 58 only 57." Sam replied

"There is always another simulation." Mac replied

"Not this time sir." Sam replied with out thinking Mac looked at her as if she grew another head.

"Excuse me?" He asked

"Oh sorry Colonel O'Neill and I have this argument a lot, only its 'plan b' or 'plan d'" Sam replied

"Ok…So you and the colonel are close?" Mac asked

"As close as two officers can be." Sam replied working on more simulations for Mac to get home.

"Oh ok, rumors are that you and Jack are an item." Mac replied Sam new his face said 'I am only trying to make conversation' but his tone was 'tell me about the competition'

"Rumors fly rampant around here; everything should be taken like a grain of salt. Nothing can be trusted." Sam replied still writing in the simulation code.

"So if I asked you out then you can't say 'no' could you?" Mac asked Sam looked at him faster than if anyone said 'The Stargate blew up'

"Yes I could say 'no' I could say no very easily. In fact I am saying no now. How dare you ask me out! I would rather go out with McKay!" Sam screeched

"I new you loved me!" Rodney said as he leant on the door frame.

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Daniel, Teal'c, Jack and Mary were all crammed into Daniel's office trying to write down the symbols on the device as best they could remember. Jack was finding it was easier to see a symbol than it was to draw it as one dot in the wrong place and instead of having 'hello' you had 'death'. This could stuff up the whole sentence and make Daniel cranky though Jack was having fun making little wisps of steam come out of his ears. While Jack was trying to remember the symbols on the console Mary was trying to write the symbols from the outer casing of the device while Jack was working on the consol as he was the one who saw the consol. Mary was fascinated by the outer casing. Jack put it down to Mary liking the jewels.

"Dr. Jackson I finished the first paragraph." Mary replied everyone in the room crowded round to look at what Mary had done. Jack saw that her translations were harder than his as she also had to include what looked like Goa'uld and Arabic mixed together.

"Interesting." Daniel muttered taking the notebook away from everyone looking at it.

"Daniel, remember that little talk we had about _sharing_?" Jack prodded Daniel looked up from the book looking at everyone else as if remembering they were there.

"Sorry, did it again didn't I?" Daniel asked looking sheepish

"The text that Mary saw is a different dialect to that that Jack saw, just very confusing." Daniel replied

"Is that good or bad?" Mary asked not looking up from the next paragraph she was writing down.

"Neither." Daniel said

"How can it be neither Daniel?" Jack asked Daniel was about to answer when Sam walked in the door looking very angry.

"Sam I thought you were doing simulations?" Daniel asked Sam just grabbed a cup of coffee and sat down next to Teal'c hidden from the door.

"Sorry had to get away from Mac and McKay for five minutes…sir if you EVER get as annoying as Mac I reserve every right to shoot you." Sam replied only to get the men to look at her strangely.

"So any closer to getting Mac home?" Sam asked sounding a little too hopeful.

"No we have got three paragraphs from Mary and a few symbols from Jack but no we have no idea." Daniel replied with out warning Mary and Jack jumped as if they were electrocuted.

"O'Neill, Mary are you all right?" Teal'c asked Jack and Mary looked more confused than anything

"Yeah T I'm ok." Jack replied all looked over to Mary who also said she was fine.

"What happened?" Sam asked

"I do not know about Colonel O'Neill but I just had a pinched nerve." Mary replied shrugging it off.

"Ditto" Jack replied not knowing how else to explain it MacKay ran into the room and looked at Jack

"Oh you're OK?" McKay asked almost disappointed

"Sorry to disappoint you." Jack retorted standing up getting rid of the pins and needles in his left leg,

"Ok MacGyver had a full seizure like epilepsy and is now in the infirmary unconscious." McKay replied. "Thought what ever was affecting him must have had an effect on you." McKay added throwing his theory around the room only to have it die somewhere in the room as no one elaborated on it

"No were fine." Jack said as they all went to the infirmary, well after Daniel went back for Mary who was still in the office working on the symbols.

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Everyone was waiting for Janet to tell them what was going on with Mac.

"It seems that Mac is having trouble being in this reality with Jack in it." Janet replied

"But I have been in his reality with out any trouble." Jack replied

"Janet would this be similar to what the other Sam went through when the other Sam and Kowalski came to our reality?" Sam asked

"Yes that could be it, but Colonel your DNA is very similar when I had done the first test results it came back positive. We had someone else look at the DNA it was so close that you could both be twin brothers." Janet replied

"So I'm safe?" Jack asked trying to follow the conversation.

"I don't know sir, I mean we got the 'me' out through the mirror before I was affected but you may be affected unless McKay and I can work out how to get you home." Sam replied

"Colonel I am ordering you to stay on base." Janet ordered when he became unwell she wanted him close by.

"Sorry to sound selfish here but what about me? I mean if there is another Mary Acret here in this reality…" Mary didn't need to finish the sentence if there was another Mary here on Earth—any where—trying to cover up the sudden illness will be too hard to explain or cover up.

"I'll go see if there is any record of Mary Acret, I need your help though the more information you can give us will be easier to find her." Jack said pulling Mary with him.

"Talk about protective streak" McKay commented before biting on an apple only to get glared at by everyone in the room

"What?" he asked innocently as if he had no idea what he had done wrong.

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A/N 2 Sorry for the shortness of the chapter but trying to remember everything you had then trying to redo it is hard. Will update when I can

Please R&R

E.


	4. SGMAC 5

A/N

Sorry for the delay...

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Jack was looking at the computer screen and all the Mary Acret's listed there was around 12 of them over the world

"Ok lets look at birth dates." Jack stated getting the DOB page up.

"30/02/86" Mary replied they then narrowed the field to two candidates One in Austria and one in Ireland.

"Ok that makes it easier." Jack muttered he got the photo up of both the girls. One was a vibrant red head with green eyes the colour of jade the other was darker than Teal'c who had black eyes and raven black hair Jack pointed to the later

"There Mary that's a spitting image of you." Jack replied making fun of the fact that Mary's hair is platinum blonde, her eyes were ice blue and her skin was bleach white.

"I do not think that is a valid description of Mary O'Neill." Teal'c replied as he walked in with his hands behind his back.

"It's a joke T." Jack replied leaning back in the chair.

"I thought with realties things were supposed to be relatively the same." Jack commented looking at Teal'c

"According to Major Carter, some realities are the same while some are not." Teal'c stated to Jack who leant forward in his chair and rubbed his face.

"We have no record of a Mary Acret fitting our Mary's description, either she has a different name like I do with Mac or she doesn't live in this reality." Jack replied.

"We will find a way to help them O'Neill. I am certain." Teal'c promised nodding to Mary who gave a small smile back

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Sam and Rodney were working in Sam's lab late pumped up on coffee working on the next lot of simulations while Daniel, Jack and Mary were working on translations while Teal'c was keeping guard over Mac still in the infirmary.

"So who talked you into changing your office around?" Rodney asked motioning to the changes Mac made

"No one." Sam replied not falling for MacKay's bait she noticed that while he was annoying she wasn't too sure who was more annoying. On one hand you had McKay who was a know it all pompous Pratt who believed he was right and everyone else was wrong but did have valid points. On the other hand you hade MacGyver who new the strengths and weaknesses of those around him and accommodated for it and who was able to help but had the ability to make a nuclear reactor with belt buckles, shoe lace and bubble gum wrappers.

"Really? 'Cause I remember your office being a lot more difficult to get anything out of. For instance the electrical cables were over here in a draw tucked away instead of being on the wall for easy access." Rodney said

"MacKay! We are here to get Mac back to his reality if you find my decorating technique to be of more interest then please leave." Sam replied.

"Mac did this didn't he?" Rodney asked rounding up on her, "Yes he did that's why you don't want to talk about your decorating! How come he moved your stuff and you didn't kill him?" Rodney asked amazement evident in his voice.

"How do you know he didn't get poisoned by me, with a slow reacting poison that would make people think it was the fact that there is two people in the same reality that is effecting Mac?" Sam asked Rodney looked at her as if she was joking but he couldn't help but wonder maybe Sam is telling the truth maybe she did…

"Your so gullible McKay." Sam said as she went back to work. They worked in complete silence before McKay clicked his fingers and punched his hand fast several times before clicking his fingers and pointing to Sam.

"You know we over looked something extremely scary and obvious" McKay stated

"What that you ate lemon for dinner?" Sam asked

"Funny, That Mary and Jack came through the iris…are you sure there wasn't lemon? I mean the chef told me—"

"McKay relax I was joking…wait that is a point how could they come through the iris? It's pure titanium only a microscopic molecule could come through" Sam replied together they headed to Daniel's office to tell the others of the discovery.

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"Ok the top line must be wrong." Daniel stated

"Why?" Jack asked balancing a pen on his finger tip

"It only lists letters and numbers YY UR YY UB I C U R YY 4 ME". Daniel read out loud

"Perhaps it is a riddle?" Jack asked looking for the pen that fell off his finger and rolled under the floor sighing Jack went to retrieve the pen on all fours

"Well I don't have a clue." Daniel replied after staring at it for a few minutes

"May I try?" Mary asked timidly the men motioned for her to continue

"Too wise you are too wise you be I see you are too wise for me." Mary replied Jack and Daniel just stared at her and then at the board. Before they could say anything Sam and Rodney crashed into the room talking at once.

"I can't believe I didn't think of that."

"Yeah well you always do over look the obvious"

"Woah woah what are you two talking about?" Jack asked

"Sir, when you and Mary came in through the gate we had the iris locked but yet you still came in that is theoretically impossible."

"Yet they still came though" Rodney said smugly

"That's why it was _Theoretical_" Sam stated before looking over to the others

"What ever that device you and Mary had found and turned on must be equipped to go through any Stargate no matter what security measures they have made on it which, needless to say—"

"We need to keep it out of Goa'uld hands." Jack and Daniel said together.

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A/N

Sorry for a short chapter but that was the best I could do, unless you wanted to wait another few weeks….

Please R&R

E.


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